[NPR Morning Edition Theme]

Radio person:"Up next, Secant Soivice: Episode Three Hundred Eightteen."

PSA Person: "Note all the characters portrayed are based off real people and portrayed by actors. No one was harmed in the production of this episode."

Tom: "Welcome back to Sports the Network, I'm Tom"
Jim: "AND IM JIM. NAK."


Jim:"TOM WE'VE SEEN SOME FINE PLAY THIS SEASON BUT THIS GAME IS VERY SPECIAL INDEED."

Tom: "That's Right Jim. For the first time in his term, President Obana Himself is here to watch the sports as they happen in the theater."

[Crowd cheering]

Agent 1: "Look, we need extra security incase he shows up. Get me that"

Obana: "Don't worry about him. We can take him if he crashes the party to get to me."

Agent 1: "Oh shit I have to go."

Announcer: "All rise for the Land of Dollers and Danger National Anthem."

[The US National Anthem Plays]

[Crowd Panic]

Crowd Person 1: "Oh my god it's Jhon Ebgret."

Crowd Person 2: "Run for your life!"

Agent 1: "President, what should we do?"

Obana: "Finsish Him."

[Door Creak]

Announcer: "Open Fire"

[Half-Life 2 Gun Sound effects]

[Glass Shatter]

Obana: "Don't be fooled, he will be back eventually. We have much to do, my SECANT SOIVICE."

[NPR Morning Edition Theme]

Tom: "What will happen next? Will Jerry admit her feelings for Obana? Will Jhon finally be brought to justice? We may only find out in the next episode of SECANT SOIVICE."

Radio Person: "We now return to your regularly scheduled Cool and New Album."